Depression??

I think I may have found a link to my periodic depression and it's evil name is...PROCRASTINATION!! Yup, it seems that when I put things off again and again, I go to a oh so familiar place of pajamas and isolation. Sunday was a good (or bad) example of this. It was a beautiful, sunny, warmish November afternoon. Jami was doing what he loves to do best, fishing, and I, being the wonderful girlfriend that I am, was going to meet him there later with lunch and coffee in hand. Well, I am not exactly sure how it happened but I quickly found myself ignoring the work I had to do and snuggled under the blanket on the couch...just staring at the ceiling. Eventually, I just sent him a message saying I wasn't feeling well and wouldn't be coming. Bad...bad...girlfriend!! I layed there until after 4 o'clock when he walked in the door. I had done nothing but sleep the entire day away, and felt terribly guilty. Which I might add, made me want to hide even more.
As I gave this more thought, I realized that I wasn't depressed, I was hiding from my responsibility, and the more I hid, the worse I felt so the more I tried to hide!! What a terrible vicious circle!
One good thing though is I know now that when I get in a mood like this, I am not slipping back into the depression I once knew when I was drinking and using. It is just that, a mood and only I can choose to change that mood. So before I went to bed on Sunday, I vowed that each morning when I woke, I was going to choose to be happy and just take, moment by moment, what is sent my way. That is all I can do.